Thoughts on nursing
- After a 3am feeding, you can sleep in any position. In general you find your neck and back in positions that make you long for the comfort and support of a middle seat in coach class on a trans-pacific flight
- Nursing your baby for 15 minutes on each boob actually takes an hour and a half
Thoughts on diapering
- "Diaper cream" should be called "All over the lower body cream"
- An explosive bowel movement means poop that soils at least 3 layers or travels at least 3 feet from the source
- Putting a diaper on a doll is helpful for the mechanics. Putting a cat on its back and adding a diaper is much more realistic
Thoughts on bathing
- Giving a newborn a bath is NOT a 1 person job
- Is your newborn really cleaner after a bath when they pee or poop just as soon as they touch the water?
Other thoughts...
- Newborn movements are very jerky and endearing, until they emphatically give you the finger
- Books about caring for your baby are reassuring only 10% of the time, the other 90% teaches you about problems you never conceived of and all the missed opportunities for stimulating your child's mental and physical development
- People say sleep when the baby sleeps...but you never realize that you have to choose between sleep and eating or sleep and showering
- I feel guilty when I don't floss...Parenting will be hard
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